Relationships are truly something special once you have become truly aware of just how special they really are. It’s not something that should be treated lightly. Relationships often suffer throughout the years because couples have grown to become overly comfortable, and when they decide to move on with their lives and goals, the relationship starts to take on the burdens of neglect. Couples put more effort into life and goals than they do their own relationships. Why? Because the chase is over and once you have spent that time trying to win someone’s love and interest, the fun dies down and life seems to kick in, therefore the relationship doesn’t get enough attention.
I have had this idea stuck in my head that love is what you actually make of it and who you make it with. For me, I don’t believe in the “honeymoon” phase. I believe that people get lazy in their relationships and therefore the relationship slips into a repetitive pattern and goes into hibernation mode. It sleeps. It stays dormant. Then, the distance between two people gets further and further and they take priority on other things that continue to put distance between couples. Through time, this causes more restraints between the start and the end of a relationship.
However, what if you loved her like you’ll lose her? What if you love her like you’ll lose her to someone who could actually give her the time, love and attention she deserves. Knowing she is not your property and you do not own her and she’s not a product, that just maybe you should consider that she’s the love of your life, but you shouldn’t expect a relationship to flourish when you get “used” to her. Getting used to her is the worst thing you can do for your relationship.
Treat her as though someone can come tomorrow and sweep her off of her feet. I know this sounds a bit frustrating to some, but there is truth to not being lazy in your relationship and then justifying why it is you’re neglectful. It is not that you shouldn’t have to put in so much time and effort into someone you’re already with, but you absolutely should and more now than ever should you!
The moment you decide that treating her any less than the very first day you met her and started dating her is the reason why your relationship is dwindling. What if you actually cared enough to keep that flame lit every day? What if you put in the very same effort every day and not just when you feel like it? Both couples, of course, will need to be on board with 24/7 love. It’s not for everyone, but if you want to see your relationship blossom, you both should be on the same page.
Life will go on, but it doesn’t mean that you have to put your needs and love aside. Life is inevitable, but your relationship is a choice and everyday you have the choice to live in the moment and add kindle to the fire to keep it lit. When you become aware of your actions, you understand that your relationship is more than a business transaction. It’s meant to be something special and unique in this wild world.
There is a lot of uncertainty within the human world. There’s a lot people stress out about and there are also really toxic and unhealthy people whom have are terrible people, have done terrible things and have had some really traumatic things happen to them and they may not know how to love or even know what love looks like or should look like. To add to this, society has done a really great job at painting the idea of love and has ingrained its image in our minds.
Love her like you will lose her to someone else tomorrow. Imagine someone else taking her out, making her laugh, opening her door, planning dates, and treating her better than the crumbs that you have been giving to her. Don’t convince her that all you are capable of is giving her crumbs and reminding her that this is what your relationship is going to look like possibly for the rest of your lives together. Show her she is worth all your time in this world. That nothing can get in between your relationship. Show her that she’s important, that she’s your best friend and the love of your life and if she is both of those I hope you take the blind fold off and realize this is your partner, your friend, your teammate, your supporter, your lover and everything in-between and not just a casual occurrence that needs no time or efforts to keep things fun and exciting.
Imagine someone being better at loving her than you. Your efforts are noted over time, and it won’t take much for the bridge to collapse under the right circumstances. A faint heart is vulnerable and if you don’t believe you are worthy of her love because you have convinced yourself that if someone comes along and sweeps her off her feet and you are ok with that because you have seen her true colors, then it is you that has set upon the explosive at the end of the bridge and the greater reason for its collapse. Don’t fault a heart for searching for love. Don’t fault a heart for answering a call that would bring her such a joy and happiness that she deserves.
Your relationship is failing because your chivalry died when she became less important to you after you won her heart over, and you made work, life, career, and friends more important than her. Love dies and relationships fail after the honeymoon phase because one or two people have actively made a decision that something other than the relationship is more important and if you are ok with going through your life in a relationship that doesn’t have any spunk to it, because you have actively made everything else around you that you can’t take with you when you die more important, then you’re likely to see an ample amount of issues occur throughout your time together.
Don’t assume your role in sweeping her off her feet is over. You still have to carry her through all those obstacles in life. The moment you put her down to get through those obstacles thinking it’ll be easier for you to go through them without holding onto her, is the moment that someone else is capable and willing to sweep her off her feet and carry her through those obstacles without putting her down.
The moment you get used to someone and put less effort into her and your relationship, is the moment you have taken the mask off to the person who pretended to be the man of her dreams to win her over and then to give up once you started dating. You sold her a facade. A version of you that may have ever existed at all, but pretending is what you used to win her heart, and then you discarded her needs for your own.
If you want better results, treat her as though you’ll lose her tomorrow. That someone better than you and you know there is someone out there that is, is going to come into her life and give her all their time, effort, attention, love and affection that she is deserving of. Don’t be selfish. Don’t assume you no longer have to put in effort. It’s a life-long commitment to love someone. It SHOULD be a life-long commitment to loving and caring about someone.
In closing, this does go both ways for both men and women. This direction was inspired by a few female experiences, including my own, so I wanted to elaborate on my blog about loving her like you’ll lose her from a female’s perspective.
©️ 2024 Riva Gijanto. All Rights Reserved. This is my hard work. Please do not steal, copy, recreate, manipulate, or use its authenticity in any way.
Life with MissRiva 
Leave a comment