I Chose Him…

The Casanova of love and oblivious to swooning, he captivated the mystery inside me. He wasn’t here for leisure and devoted to discipline he knew what he wanted and with focused precision and without knowing that the universe would intersect our paths and that destiny would be our prayers paired.

In all the glory, there was a bit of hope, but deception would cease the illusion of what would become an illusive connection bound by an authentic reality. It wasn’t by mistake, and it was perfectly orchestrated on our behalf. Two people not looking, but thoughts strung into the infinite nothingness that surrounded our existence, sending signals into the ethereals that only the highest of creators could invest into making a fairytale come true.

Maybe we were always destined, or maybe we are the making of a miracle, but comprehending a phenomenon that there’s no logical explanation to, to create a vision for only an imaginative creator by design. Are we the creators or merely the construct of something else’s idea?

Perhaps we signed up for an earthly experience, and we knew what we’d endure during our short visit here. Perhaps we created the obstacles and challenges so that we would find one another. However the story was written, I still believed he was too good for me. I imagined a version of him, and I envisioned him long before our union. While I hoped he was real and he was out there in the glimpse of our seen reality, I still pondered the idea that it might be true that what I was looking for just didn’t exist.

I would like to think he was created by my imagination and a miracle that came to fruition. A prayer answered long before I even asked. How darling he was, and I uncontrollably melt when I’m with him.

I chose him. Like a playful child’s game of duck, duck, goose, I inevitably caught a glimpse of my future when we locked eyes. Oh, bewildered by the internal fireworks that sparked from an internal coffin, under my breath, I whispered “goose” before reaching him. Playfully, I teased duck, duck, as I gently tapped the onlookers hoping to be goosed by me, but I knew who I really wanted to chase me in that crowded circle. It was him, and so I chose him… only him…

As I approached him, I could hear his thoughts amongst them all. He too wanted me to goose him and so I grinned as I approached him from behind and I could feel his energy, that he was already prepared for the chase. He’d been preparing for this moment his entire life, and he had tools that no one thought to equip, very important tools. The kind of tools you need in order to go deep beyond the surface and like a blacksmith, he engineered and welded tools that he too knew he wanted to use and how those tools would be used by his equal.

When I slowed my pace upon coming up behind him, he peered my way from his peripheral. I could hear his thoughts; they were loud and more confident than all the others, but suddenly silent as I made my way swiftly past him, grazing his shoulder as I whispered, “Goose.” Mmmm… what a fun game to play with the one whom I love. I knew he’d win, but I couldn’t let him know that. Although, I believe he knew he would win too.

The chase was exhilarating, and as I leaned into the bend of the circle and dashed by all the onlookers, I knew it had to be him, or it couldn’t be anyone else. The onlookers braced for his failure and awaited their turn, but he had a tool that none of them had. He had the one tool I’ve been searching for, but that only one exists.

I didn’t dare look behind me, I kept my focus ahead but I could sense that he was right on my tail and as I approached the empty space where he was once sat, I was whisked away in a graceful tackle from behind as he engulfed his entire being into me. Once we collided, it was a perfect match, and our bond was sealed.

Our euphoric energy instantaneously unionized, and it was a blissful euphoria that onlookers wished they could experience for themselves. I could hear the universal watchers jumping out of their thrones and cheering for our union, cheering that we found each other, like an orchestrated game or a well played movie. Everything made sense, and our energy dissipated and combined, creating a chemical cosmic combustion into the empty space that created our existence.

Oh, how I chose him before I knew I had.

I chose him because before we even met, he already loved me.
He loved me for me.
I chose him because he saw within me.
He saw me for me.
I chose him because he loves with his heart.
He loves with his whole heart.
I chose him because I feel safe.
He protects me and my heart.
I chose him because he chose love first.
He isn’t easily distracted.
I chose him because he makes me feel loved.
He’s affectionate and loving.
I chose him because he sees me as his equal.
I’m not beneath him.
I chose him because it’s the way he looks at me.
His eyes speak unspoken words.
I chose him because he let his guard completely down.
He’s openly vulnerable and exposed.
I chose him because he treats me like his princess.
He caters to my happiness.
I chose him because he effortlessly tries.
It’s seemingly easy with him.
I chose him because he brings me happiness.
My internal being ignites with him.
I chose him because when he kisses me, he’s present.
His kisses are a product of art.
I chose him because he’s patient.
There’s no rush.
I chose him because he wanted me.
For the same reasons that I would want me.
I chose him because he chose me.
We chose the same love story.
I chose him because his energy compliments mine.
Like the Yin and Yang.
I chose him because it was only ever going to be him.
He completes me.

When I chose him it was that exact present moment where knowing who the love of my life was, was standing beneath the same full moon, looking up and wondering if the love of his life was looking at the moon at the same time as he.

In the grand scheme of things, the universe orchestrated a play in hopes that the actors would play their parts and that everything would fall into place as it was originally scripted and planned.

Choosing him was easy… no pain, no suffering, no illusion. Just gliding into one another with ease as our euphoria collided. Our dance was a match, and I thank the universe for playing out our scene.

In the midst of this wild untamed ride into the unknown, what’s certain in this mystery- is him… he’s the only experience that makes sense and worthwhile exploring beyond the barrier of reality. Like how the universe is always expanding, perhaps the phenomenon of our love story will push the limits of our unseen reality and guide us into an uncharted dimensional enigma.

©️ 2023 Riva Gijanto. All Rights Reserved. This is my hard work. Please do not steal, copy, recreate, manipulate, or use its authenticity in any way


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